Happy Halloween

I know that today is supposed to be filled with frights, ghosts, ghouls, etc. I guess that I just wasn’t prepared for how terrifying this day could actually be.

I just received an e-mail from my college class president updating me on what is happening with my classmates after college. I get these about quarterly, and they seem fairly innocuous, but trust me there is evil lurking in the attachment. Everyone is getting married. The e-mail is just a litany of engagements, one after another, building to a crescendo that could only please Satan himself.

It is not just the number of people getting married, but who is getting married. One of my freshman year roommates is married. This is a guy who was caught urinating off of the second floor of our dorm before the first week of school had ended! An act that I believe perfectly set the tone for the next four years. Also, decorum prevents me from describing my first meeting with his wife.

I realized that I get to be Peter Pan for Halloween, and I didn’t even have to buy a costume.


  1. Tell me about it. I just returned from a wedding of a friend from high school and I was literally the only single person there besides the bride's sister, who is 23. Everyone is either married already or living with someone and planning on getting married pretty soon. And don't get me started on how many friggin' babies have been born and/or conceived this year. I'm willing to bet I was the only person at the wedding who was hungover as well. There's even more meaning in that, I fear.

  2. I bet it wouldn't be as bad if you had gone to a school with normal people.

  3. I should have paid more attention when I was told that a cult-like percentage of people at Hamilton got married to a fellow student. That is the case with my class. It is weird and wrong, and I don't like it one damn bit.